Two Koreas Clash

North and South Korea have clashed in the Yellow Sea. The South Koreans say a North Korean vessel crossed into their waters where gunfire was exchanged. The South Korean ship was not damaged but the North Korean ship was in flames as it headed for home to a heroes welcome for destroying the entire South Korean navy, humiliating the US fleet and causing the financial collapse of the entire Western world.

Curves Are Smarter

Curvy women are likely to be smarter than thin counterparts and may produce more intelligent offspring. Scientists say one should look for the greatest difference between the waist and the hips because the booty stores Omega-3 which could improve the mental abilities of both the child and mother, even if the father is an idiot.

Engineered Penis Works

Scientists have been able to completely replace the erectile tissue of the penis in rabbits. The rabbits who were given the engineered tissue were able to function sexually and produce offspring. I’m just saying.